President Ralph W. Eathervane hopes expert predictions of a busy storm season result in brisk business this year for his company, International Storm Registry, which auctions and/or sells naming rights to violent and destructive storms around the world.
“Experts predict 17 named storms in 2007, with nine of them hurricanes and five capable of sustained winds of 111 mph or greater,” Eathervane said during a telephone interview this morning, “and at least one major hurricane is expected to hit the U.S. coast.
“That means there will be many opportunities for you to Name a Storm After Someone You Love!” he continued.
“We live in a world in which weather events generate a tremendous amount of news media coverage,” Eathervane said. “At the same time, many people have a hard time finding gifts for their friends and loved ones. To them, I say, nothing says ‘I love you’ better than having a storm named after you.”
[Editor's Note: The "news" above is fictitious and exists only as a parody of an actual unnamed business. To purchase merchandise bearing the International Storm Registry logo, click here or click on the image shown above.]
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