Below are a half-dozen news headlines I found worthy of twisting into one-liner observations that might make you laugh:
- Hallmark introduces gay marriage greeting cards. Does anyone still shop there?
- Living with humans has taught dogs morals, say scientists. Perhaps, politicians should try living among humans.
- Fifty-eight-year-old Mark Spitz says Michael Phelps couldn’t have beat him. Depends.
- Alligators are swimming in the streets in Florida. Apparently, John Edwards has ditched Elizabeth, relocated his law office and gone back to work as a trial lawyer.
- Texas to execute mentally-ill man. Much to the disappointment of ignorant liberals and late-night talk show hosts everywhere, it’s not George W. Bush.
- Iran’s says it’s going to send a man into space. I nominate Mahmoud Ahmadinejad!
2 responses so far ↓
1 Skunkfeathers // Aug 21, 2008 at 1:17 pm
1. Audio versions come in a variety of languages and lisps.
2. Does that mean that dogs, living with politicians, have learned how to lie, cheat, steal, and basically throw morals out with the cat?
3. Phelps probably wouldn’t beat Spitz now; Phelps appears to respect his elders, even the arrogant, mouthy ones.
4. Yeah, if Texas were doing as the libs desire, you’d be hearing the ultimate flip-flop on the death penalty, shore ’nuff.
5. What comes first: Iran sending an (i)mam into space, or Iran being the first country blown into space by Israel….before you answer, check odds in Vegas…
2 hotoffthepress2 // Aug 21, 2008 at 1:29 pm
Skunk — Astute observations as always! Thanks!
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